Why I Believe I Should Never Have Married

Are you too under the delusion that marriage and motherhood are the tasks of women in creation?

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There’s a general belief that the role of women in creation is motherhood. Towards this end, most girls, (myself inclusive) have been deluded into the notion of motherhood and marriage. In some cultures, girls are brought up to be good wives and mothers, deem to be their ultimate task.

In some ‘primitive cultures’, girls are ‘’whisked off’’ to a man’s house, as soon as the girl starts her first period. And in some Western Cultures, most educated women are secretly afraid of being an old maid, so they just settle to marry, even if they have doubt about such a relationship.

A friend did confess to the fright of ‘’been left on the shelf’’ after failing to secure a solid relationship in University. She was also afraid the ‘’sell-by date’’ for motherhood. ‘How come these issues are the sole concern of women’, she asked me? Men are supposedly fertile for life, whereas women physiology means, there is a time limit for motherhood. I reminded her that with the new technology, she can freeze her ovaries for later years. She wasn’t keen on this.

Normality Is According To Tradition

This is the work of Lucifer to debase womanhood thus delivering a heavy blow on humanity on the wrong assertion that a ‘’normal’’ woman must go through marriage and motherhood to find love and happiness. Normality here is according to the so-called tradition of the people.

This happened to me and did not realise this until I was in a marriage. I have always been an independent free-spirited person. I found it difficult to pretend or cloud who I really was, so the inner range and battle for freedom continued within my marriage. What do you do, express yourself and damn the consequence? Most times, I didn’t. I wanted to maintain peace and stability in the relationship. I didn’t want to be the one who was always bringing issues, who was always complaining.

‘’Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming: 1, whenever you are wrong, admit it. 2, whenever you are right, shut up.’’ Shaquille O’Neal

Now several years after, with my battle for survival and happiness, I can honestly advise many that marriage and motherhood are not for everyone. The issue here is for women to be bold to admit it. Most crave for it, but never bold enough to live the life they want because of societal dogma. The worse are those afraid to leave an abusive relationship until it is too late.

Procreation Is For The Earth Only

Over the years, with my spiritual development, I come to realise that marriage and motherhood are only for the physical, and the role of women is much higher and nobler than either marriage and motherhood. Marriage or motherhood has no relevance to the person’s ascent. That is, no spiritual relevance, other than what she contributes by way of her behaviour in the relationship. However, the instinct of motherhood is present in all-female in the creation and it is to nurture the young to adulthood.

This instinct to nurture the young makes motherhood sacred. Nevertheless, it is not the highest task of a woman nor the destiny she bears in creation.

This is one reason most animals will face death for their young as they fear the enemy.

The Highest Task

Women are more delicate intuitively, hence easily receive more connection to the Light. This makes it easier to also connect to Luminous Regions above. A woman should not be a slave to fashion follies or deviate from what true beauty is. And definitely not with the vanity that necessitates shamelessness.

A woman should fulfil her task in creation with gracefulness, which is granted her alone as the most beautiful endowment of the spirit. Gracefulness makes a woman. And without purity, there can no thought of gracefulness. Gracefulness makes the woman which alone holds true beauty at any age.

‘’Every look, every movement, every word must with womanhood bear the stamp of her nobility of soul. Therein lies her task, also her might and her greatness.’’ Oskar Berhadt (1875–1946)

Ennoblement Of Her Surrounding

Some might be wondering what this indicates. It is both having a conscious attitude in everything a woman is doing, in every decision, she’s making, having become conscious of her position and the possible influence she can have on her surrounding.

The practicality is varied and numerous and as unique as individuals concerned. Everything in our surrounding animates. I say so because we know of the elementals and the radiation in such things as rocks and stones.

We should bring out the best in others because as women, we are able to encourage, nurture and inspire. And it does not always have to be vocal. We can work in thoughts too.

We can foster that which is of value and virtues by developing them, first in ourselves, and being an example in our homes, workplace, communities etc, expressing our sense of beauty and fostering peace, serenity and tranquillity.

The woman who only wants to live as a wife and mother has missed her actual purpose and task.

An avid reader. A lover of Nature as Nature is the language of God. Trust your intuition. It is always right. Email: lanu_bennett@hotmail.com

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